


Face Our Mistakes and Sins

by Kinoink



Series: Tales from Ishgard and Beyond [2]
Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Black Mage Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Gen, General relationships - Freeform, Minor Spoilers, Miqo'te Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), friendships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-18
Packaged: 2020-05-13 22:35:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19260520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kinoink/pseuds/Kinoink
Summary: Alphinaud Leveilleur for all his good nature, has as much a grudge in the past, and Gi'ntana as Warrior of Light carries a heavy burden. It seems it's time to relieve some of that heavy baggage from the past.





	Face Our Mistakes and Sins

**Author's Note:**

> Wanting to explore the chances that Alphinaud didn't get along with every Warrior of Light equally. Also, this was probably the longest one I wrote. I want to say there are some minor spoilers involved for end ARR content!

Depending on who had their hands upon it, magic could be known and even seen as good or evil. One wrong user could taint such a name, making word spread like a wildfire and make companions start questioning the person they had known for so long. Alphinaud witnessed the sight of flames licking across the corpse in the snow, burning until it would be inevitable that nothing would be left within a bell or two, just ash and a skeleton. He lowered down the shield he had created, for the creature had been almost upon him until the explosion of fire had created the final blow that even now had its howls practically echoing across the vast grey sky, but his focus was averted over to Gi’ntana and the staff she grasped in her hand, the purple light of the orb still glowing ominously against the silhouette of the comet shape many had labeled as an omen of destruction (even if it were just a mere replica). While he had himself grown used to the use of fire and ice for his Warrior of Light, in the flickering flames and faint purple glow of the staff head, he saw something in the shadows of her mismatched eyes, making the Miqo’te appear nothing more than listless.

The young Elezen glanced one more time to the burning corpse reaching into the bloody snow to remove what was essentially a fang that had gotten knocked out some time ago. It was disgusting to hold, but it would at least prove a trophy of the killing before he would approach the chosen champion, reaching out a hand to lightly touch upon her upper arm. “Are you well?” he asked, the only question he could since she had not spoken since earlier before they fell into combat. It was unlike the usually outspoken Miqo’te to fall into such a lapse of silence, dead quiet, staring into oblivion, except for the few moments before the Scions moved from Vesper Bay to Revenant’s Toll. At this point, he had grown accustomed to having her speak her mind on matters no matter how silly, it made his time feel a bit more whole.

Inhaling in a sharp breath she didn’t know she had been holding Gi’ntana would turn her head to face Alphinaud, surprised, but there was something lingering deep again. “Ah-um...certainly, I’m fine.” She reached over to ruffle his hair gently, putting on a smile. “Let’s return to the inn at Falcon’s Nest and get ready for the next leg of our trip.” she told him, but Alphinaud would hesitate before reluctantly agreeing, after all there was a time and a place to speak about this and this wasn’t the best time or place. He glanced over as the Warrior of Light would gather up their packs, a faint scent of incense hanging in the air from a lit pyre nearby that they had used to lure the creature in question, but as he turned to walk ahead he would peer over his shoulder one more time to see that contemplative look on her face again stalled and staring at the flames until following up behind him.

 

It had taken days for them to return to Falcon’s Nest to have a reprieve, considering the malms they traveled in order to both make camp and find the last known location for their target, but once they would return they would take a night’s reprieve in order to make for the rest of the journey. However, even on the way back, Alphinaud felt perturbed by his companion’s lack of really wanting to speak. At first he brushed it off as a simple notion that she would be better come the following day, but even then the silence was painful. When he did actually talk to her, she would almost jump out of her skin as if she had been somewhere far away. At the inn though, this would be his best opportunity to see if he could coax her. Alphinaud hated to pry since he didn’t like anyone prying into his own personal business, but this was something he had to do as he would go to the room they were staying in and out of either habit, or manners, he would knock on the door to wait for her to respond.

 

Gi’ntana sighed as she stared out at the grey stone walls built like a fortress in order to protect against any form of attack, snow falling yet again. Perhaps it was wishful thinking that the clouds would one day clear and the sun would shine on the land once more. However, she would pull herself back out from viewing the scenery as she gazed at the stone resting flat on her ungloved palm, a vibrant shade of purple with the etching of a comet engraved into it. It hummed with life as magical energy would still surge through, the magic that gave her the strength to still stand and fight, that had gotten her so far along. It has been whispered that anyone who traveled down the path of a Black Mage was evil, or even bound to be cursed by their own hubris, and desire for so much more power that it would drive them into madness as the void would come seeking them out to tempt them away (or simply destroy themselves). Absently her fingers would tighten around the stone, ruby and sapphire eyes scowling uncharacteristically knitting her brows, she was so much better than this...even after a misstep could have gotten her killed, she was still alive...still breathing...and questioning just how she still fit that title “Warrior of Light” that Minfillia had graced her. Either the void didn’t want to bother consuming her, she was protected with the blessing (not so much right now though), or it was some kind of odd thread of destiny she hasn’t lost it like many in the past.

_ “A mage like her, one who studies in the black arts, should not be considered for such a thing as “Warrior of Light”.” _

_ “Alphinaud…” _

Those voices, an echo of the past still resonated inside of her mind. She had not meant to, but it seemed that her special ability had a mind of its own, peering into Alphinaud’s past though moments after it happened when she had next seen him almost storming out of the Solar and passing unto her a glare that could have withered the most beautiful of roses. With a sigh she would curl her knees to her chest, staring at her reflection on the darkened window glass as the glow from the crystal in her palm still radiated that purple glow against her face. Her ear twitched though when she heard the knock on the door, “Yes?” she called before the Elezen would open the door while holding two metal cups in his hand. “...You know you could have come in at any time instead of knocking.” she told him, still somewhat curled up in her seat by the window.

 

“Figured it more prudent to knock, pulls you out of wherever your mind was parting to.” Alphinaud explained his reasoning as he would set the mugs down, steam rising out and the Miqo’te leaned over to peer down at what was inside. When she had seen the contents her eyes averted back up with a raised eyebrow at what was basically a broth with vegetables floating around with a few cubes of meat, and it made Alphinaud smirk, “Pray, forgive the oddity, while unconventional ‘twas the only dish they had in the kitchen. The inn is rather busy tonight.” He soon sat himself down at the chair across from her, with the small table between them.

His blue eyes watched as Gi’ntana reached over to pick up the one in front of her and leaned back a bit in the chair, wood creaking under her shifting weight, fist still adamantly clamped around something giving off a purple light. “What do you have there in your grasp?” he asked curiously and the slightly brighter face that had been there with the sight of sustenance and company...suddenly fell a little flat. If a mortal could curl further into themselves, she would have as the tail wrapped around her ankles.

 

“It’s the mark of a Black Mage.” she muttered and looked at her mug of stew for a moment before blowing across the surface in order to take a small sip of the broth. With a wince it was obvious the steaming creation had scalded her mouth a bit, but she looked up to meet his blue eyes and blinked a little bit. She remembered back when she had first joined with the Scions, those blue eyes had withered her insides from his glare, but now...it was just so different. Shifting her weight the Warrior of Light slid the object away into a pouch around her waist, before glancing out the window again to her reflection, “...It is...odd sometimes to have you look to me with the eyes of a friend...rather than an enemy, or some kind of traitor.” she sighed resting her head on the cool glass, but she could still faintly see the look of what appeared to be guilt cross the Arcanist’s face.

Ah, it seemed he did recall.

“Listen Alphinaud,” Gi’ntana would begin to now face the Elezen squarely (well it seemed he didn’t have to coax her), “whether it was an accident...or some kind of greater grand design, but that night you stormed out of the Solar in Vesper Bay, the Echo showed me just what happened behind those closed doors when I returned.” she murmured, she had not dared to tell him back then while they had been on shaky ground as it was, but before it had been forgotten though not completely as it was just repressed to the back of both their minds.

“Mm…” Alphinaud would reach over and pull the other metal mug close to him for a moment, “I was overhasty and judgemental as well as arrogant just because of your study in magic was different, even when you originally came to the Scions as a mere Thaumaturge.” 

“But at the same time...you were not fully incorrect where you wished to place your trust. A title so pure, with a soul that could be corrupted by the dark powers of destructive magicks.” She frowned deeply swirling some of the vegetables around in her mug to see what she could get to surface for a moment. Again a heavy blanket of silence would fall over them as they would weigh what could have basically been called the sins or faults of their past misgivings.

“How much of that side of me did you see?” Alphinaud once more broke the silence, glancing up at the guilty looking Miqo’te that was in retrospect his Warrior of Light by this time, no matter what. He watched as the two colored eyes looked up at him, brow wrinkled with a hint of sadness before she would start to recall what he had said to Minfillia and the other Scions at the time she had started to develop into studying the more dangerous magic.

 

_ Alphinaud walked at a quick clip down the carpeted hallway of the Waking Sands hallway, face firmly set as he would start his approach to the Solar where he had requested a meeting with Minfillia. He had seen what was becoming of the supposed chosen champion of Hydaelyn’s. One who was supposed to have a pure heart in order to allow the blessing in, was turning to destructive magic, black magic as he saw it. As he would open the door with a heavy thunk he glanced inside and saw Y’shtola also present, arms lightly crossed as she and Minfillia spoke in quiet voices. _

_ However, it was Minfillia who looked to him with a kind smile that would have made him hesitate his actions, but he was determined this day, he couldn’t back down. “Alphinaud, it’s a pleasure to have you here. When you contacted me by linkpearl, I was quite happy to hear what you wanted to have this meeting, though you weren’t quite clear as to what it regarded.” she spoke, standing up as Y’shtola dropped her arms for a moment, bowing her head politely to Alphinaud. _

_ “If you wish, I can depart for the moment.” The Miqo’te spoke in her calm tones, it was a wonder if she ever gotten angry before. Alphinaud though would shake his head, saying he could actually use Y’shtola as someone who could offer her opinion to the matter, or if any act as a mediator if the topic ended up getting heated. Stay she would and a look of contemplation crossed Minfillia’s features, originally thinking that the meeting was to be private, but it would seem their youngest had other thoughts in mind. _

_ Raising a hand the antecedent would create an open gesture as to say that the floor was Alphinaud’s to have at the moment. This time, it was the point of no return. The subject matter on his tongue had to be said even if it would cause bad blood, opinions, or a horrid backlash between himself and the two before him. Taking a deep breath he would start to speak calmly, _

_ “It is in regards to the newest among our ranks, the one that we have bestowed the title of Warrior of Light. Far be it for me to question the machinations of Hydaelyn, but this judgement she may have had, I fear it could have been incorrect. While the way Miss Khilo had come to the Scions as a mere Thaumaturge, it is plain to witness the path she is treading upon is leading her the ways to destructive forces. I fear once she does finally commits to it, it will harbor a stain on the pure soul that Hydaelyn originally believed, that we believed.” He let it out, sighing deeply as he let his hands rest at his sides, waiting as the two women in the room were staring at him with shock, the worst being on Minfillia’s face (since she came to care deeply for the newly respected Warrior of Light).  _

_ “Alphinaud, mayhap you are jumping to your conclusions to sully the decisions based upon the Scions of the Seventh Dawn. You, yourself, had agreed to the terms of the title. As far as we have seen as a whole, she has been quite adamant about her position here, even if it does feel as if we imposed with being a champion to Eorzea.” Y’shtola spoke up, keeping her tone level, but the hairs on her neck were standing on end puffing up like a kitten perhaps would. “By the Twelve, what makes you believe that she will be treading this path that will do such a thing?” _

_ “I bore witness to her consorting with the Lalafell, Lalai, who is quite well known in practitioning in the ways of black magic herself. You can even speak to the receptionist of the original Thaumaturge’s guild within Ul’dah if you wish to confirm, that Gi’ntana had not been seen since Lalai had come in through the doors. No good comes from any that study in the ways of  the Black. Some can’t even control the newly tapped destructive powers and can be a danger to themselves and others around them.” _

_ “Alphinaud, you’re speaking with mere theoretical. There is no evidence, nor proof to see the declining path of the champion that has been chosen. At the moment tis just conjecture.” Minfillia spoke up now, her voice worried as she tried to discern the possibility that Alphinaud was proposing as Y’shtola looked pensive, knuckles gently tapping against her cheekbone, a typical thoughtful gesture. _

_ “While it is a truth that most Black Mages of the past have been known to lose themselves with the power they wield with a hunger that can sometimes never be satiated. The true power comes from the strength of the person who can use it, and what it can be used for. Most have been written as corrupted, but there can be a hidden gem that a handful cannot. Some not as known as they are not written in the annals of history.” Y’shtola interjected closing her eyes for a moment before she would glance at Alphinaud, a frown gracing her usually poker-style face. _

 

_ Alphinaud’s jaw would clench slightly, getting a little bit tighter than he had earlier when he had set his thoughts into motion when wanting to speak to Minfillia. “And what of the blood rituals? The voidsents? Black magic is not a thing to be trifled with! You and I both know that just as much as any others within the Scions, Y’shtola.” His blue eyes hardened as he would look over to the Miqo’te before him. “It is my opinion to ask that you perhaps reconsult with Hydaelyn and see if there is no other that can bear the burden as Warrior of Light.” _

_ Teeth baring now, Y’shtola stepped forward, “You’re questioning not just Hydaelyn’s judgement, but the judgement of this group themselves!” she snapped at last while Minfilla was working to absorb the information that had been laid bare before them, “Gi’ntana has slain great primals that threatened Eorzea, and no word has ever come from pure spite and conjecture until this moment. Why the sudden change of mind Alphinaud? Why do you recind something you also agreed upon yourself? Because you believe that the tales of the past are doomed to repeat themselves?” _

_ “I believe it’s possible that corruption can happen Y’shtola!” He argued right back, fists clenching tightly at his sides as his blood was starting to boil. How was it that neither of them could understand where he was coming from. “A mage like her, who studies in the dark arts, should not be given such a consideration as “Warrior of Light”.” He kept his statement firm, despite how much he wished to lash out again. _

_ “Alphinaud…!” Minfillia cried out of shock of the fact that the Elezen was putting his foot down and trying to push what he believed to be the truth upon their earlier judgments. She sighed, taking in a deep breath to calm herself as well. Arguing begets more arguing, and they wouldn’t go anywhere, “I stand firm to Hydaelyn’s judgement, Alphinaud.” she replied to the accusations, wanting this to end for the moment, “As well as the judgement of the Scions, Miss Khilo will still remain with us until it is profound that she is a danger to herself, us, and Eorzea. I for one am willing to believe that magic, no matter how dark, can be used for the good of all in the right hands.”  _

 

_ The scholar’s blood ran cold then and it felt as if the air had gotten knocked out of him. The antecedent’s word was usually firm and law within the Scions, but he couldn’t believe the fact that she was closing herself off to the possibilities that something could potentially go wrong. He clenched his fists tighter that nails dug into flesh but did not bleed, knuckles turning white and his lips formed a thin line. Slowly, he would release the tension letting his hands rest against his sides, “Very well. If you believe your judgement as just, antecedent, then who am I to argue further?” he relinquished despite the bit of blood still boiling from anger, resting a hand on his chest he would offer a bow and start to turn to go, that mask falling to frustration. If that was how they wished to see it, very well, he would allow them to live within their delusions of having the perfect champion. He would be there to tell them how correct he had been when the time would come. _

 

As Alphinaud sat there across from Gi’ntana now, as she finished up the rendition of the past she had seen whether intentioned or not, he realized now that the time he believed would come to the day he would tell Minfillia he had been correct all along...never came at all. It would mayhap never come in the future. The thought for a moment made his throat dry a bit and he drank down the remains of his stew with a sigh setting the mug down with a light thunk before looking back to that downcast face of the Miqo’te, “It’s no small wonder you stopped speaking when I was present.” He muttered with a frown then leaned back in the chair with a heavy sigh, almost inappropriately slumping in his seat. He was no longer looking to the champion that was sitting just across from him, perplexed at his sudden lack of proper etiquette, but he recalled after the fight against the Garlean empire at the time, in a medical ward as he was working on healing her as their other healers were seeing to others and Thancred. He saw that momentary fear in her eyes before he had without thinking lectured her about how dangerous it was and how lucky she was to be alive getting out of that exploding building, how worried sick they had all started to become.

That voice still rattled him, the meek, slightly scratchy from misuse one that she held after he had finished his job, “I’m sorry”. That had been jarring for after she fell into that almost vow of silence, that was the first thing that came out...and Alphinaud had thought little of it at the time. Against the arms of the chair he clenched his fists, inhaling a sharp breath, as if trying to keep his composure, “And yet after how I treated you, as just an object, a tool to better Eorzea, for my own agenda, and worst of all the least amount of respect that you deserved...you’re still here.” Relieving the tension in one of his fists he reached up to brush them through his bangs, he could feel the tears he was fighting back as everything was starting to come up to the surface. His teeth were grinding a bit but he blinked when he felt a shadow started to cast above him...only to see as Gi’ntana had pulled herself out of her chair and was taken down to a knee before him, hand resting lightly on his own.

“Alphinaud, if...there was something that I wish I didn’t cover up until tonight, it would be that your original input about me would have been correct if not for Hydaelyn’s interference against Lahabrea.” She told him as she placed her hand lightly over his, staring at the floor, it was her who should be questioning how he hasn’t gotten sick of her yet or trusted her not enough and would turn her away at every opportune moment. Her stomach twisted in knots as she could feel his questioning look, “...I almost lost control completely, Lahabrea had gotten under my skin…I believed that the right thing at the time...that for Lahabrea to be gone was to destroy Thancred with him...” Her eyes gazed to her hand that had been lightly clasping Alphinaud’s now in order to keep herself from the shaking that was getting through her body, recalling the internal fight with herself as the fire spell that would have left Thancred as nothing but a burning corpse behind while the Ascian’s voice was using Thancred’s body like a damned puppet, yet it had gone all around her, echoing and resonating that it felt like it was the only solution.

However, the end of her internal conflict came when just before the spell was ready to be cast out after being egged on, Hydaelyn had been the one to interfere. There had been another way, the secret weapon dubbed the “Sword of Light” they had tried to replicate in the Rolling Stones. Her stomach sank as she thought back to Moenbryda who had sacrificed herself to destroy the Ascian that invaded their home.

“It feels as if death follows me like a shadow…” Gi’ntana spoke as she finally gazed up at Alphinaud, “...I could have killed Thancred and even myself in the process, Moenbryda sacrificed herself in order to replicate a weapon that I don’t even KNOW how I managed to produce in the first place, the Sultana was poisoned, now...the other Scions, they could be...and I…” her shoulders slumped, throat becoming tight as she stared down at the floor again, unable to contain herself as she thought of all the possibilities and the actual deaths that followed behind her. While mere coincidence and bad timing was the truth, she felt like a plague on people wherever she went someone would either choose to sacrifice themselves or killed with no remorse. “...I don’t know how you can still bear to have me around when it feels like I’m not really a hero, just...a missionary of death…” Stains started to appear on the stone floor as tears were running out from the corners of her eyes, chest heaving, finally letting everything just come out and fall apart. No longer the strong and stoic face she held in the public eye, but now letting out her sorrows, her mourning, her frustrations of the past events that she repressed away just to make sure that everyone else was better.

“I’m not the champion, nor the hero you deserve…”

 

Alphinaud was sitting there in shock as he tried to absorb the utter break down that was before him while it sunk in, he thought back to how he originally treated her, seeing only what was black and white in front of him. He believed what he thought was right...and didn’t trust her until he found her as nothing more than a useful tool to better his own ambitions, yet after all this she still stayed. She stayed when she could have simply left him behind while stuck in his own head, making sure they would have the security of a place to call safe. Never once had he considered the amount of pain that had been weighing his Warrior of Light’s heart, the trauma that had been placed. Slowly he would remove himself from the chair and get down to her level (best he could...she was still a head taller than he, bit annoying sometimes), and would stretch his arms out in order to encircle his arms around her shoulders, fingers gripping tight into the shirt she wore. He wasn’t one for displaying such affection, but this was a special case, he couldn’t bear the sight of seeing Gi’ntana have this complete break down before him.

Her posture stiffened and a reflex had made her twitch, mayhap about to push him away, but she was sitting in shock as he placed his head against her shoulder. “You may think you’re not the champion, or a hero, that we deserve…” he muttered as his voice softened, it would have been inaudible if not for the Miqo’te’s keen sense of hearing, “But...you’re...always going to be the one that we need. The one that I need. Never say you are a missionary of death...when you’ve given many a reason to have hope.” For all his wit, his silver tongued diplomacy he had been blind to the person who sacrificed so much, a life of freedom and casual adventuring to defend Eorzea, just because of a simple class of magic that she used. Absently his grip would tighten as he spoke a quiet apology, for everything he did to prove her as a bad choice of judgement, because Gi’ntana was for true a Warrior of Light, in action, deeds, and mouth. Now, he was going to support Hydaelyn’s champion, and the friend close to his heart along that tightrope, to catch her if she fell, aiding to pick up the pieces if all fell apart.

 

As the shock wore off though, Gi’ntana sat there still, absorbing the apology that had been soft-spoken. While she had known the young Elezen to be good natured, yet stubborn, he had a tendency to hold rather firm to his beliefs unless it was to get him further. However, the apology rang sincere in her ears and slowly she would raise her arms and wrap them around his back, closing her eyes as she let her head rest against his own shoulder even as tears left behind would drip into the crisp fabric. Relief flooded her making the tears she was shedding feel almost like a cleansing release, purely happy that her closest friend and ally had taken her in, no matter her studies, and faults in the end.

She gave a wobbly smile that was hidden away in the blue jacket, “Thank you.” she croaked out as they stayed in the comfort of the embrace, baggage felt as if it had fallen away from their shoulders, leaving hearts lighter, and now they had a path to move forward to make the world a better, more peaceful place for all.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed, and don't forget Kudos and Comments are welcome to keep me motivated. There will be more oneshots to come, maybe even parts of the series with a few chapters in them!


End file.
